September 20, 2009 at 10:49am
Mood: D:
Music: runaway-three days grace
Subject: i need to give these boys ring tones.

he is my best friend.
i love him as my best friend.
it was right to not lead him on.

despite how well he took it,
i feel horrible.

HATE ME.

anyway, so now i'm single.
and fairly certain i want to stay that way
at least until i can tell everyone i like girls (:

i wouldn't want to bring a girl home and it be a surprise ;D
yeah right, they all know, i just am fooling myself.

i won't find anyone anyways.
not anyone i want.

just everyone who wants me.
which sucks because i never want them

oh well.
i guess, life moves on.
i feel better sort of.

i would feel more whole with a signifigant other
but that's just because i don't like being alone
i need to belong to someone.

i guess really i just need someone to love me.
haha.
love me unconditionally.
because no one has ever.

at least, my mother never has.
i'm always looking for what my mother never gave me.


maybe i shouldn't.
<3