July 1, 2009 at 3:09pm
Music: Bella's lullaby
Subject: bitchfest.

Internet and cable are getting shut off today sometime. Luckily, I had enough time to get on here and let people know what was going on. This is gonna suck. Like... I haven't been doing anything lately because my boyfriend has been in treatment. I actually went out last night to a friend's house. But otherwise, nothing. All I've been doing is sitting on the computer or watching TV and now I can't do either of them. Seriously, this is gonna suck. It probably doesn't sound like that big of a deal, but it is. Now my depression is gonna get even worse. If I want to go on the computer, I'm gonna have to bike to the library. But that closes at a certain time. I went online late at night because I couldn't sleep and I needed to not think. Now I'll have nothing to do. Ugh. My mom and I were talking about moving without my brother and now he's going today to try and get a job. I know she's just gonna give in to him again. I hate when she does that. She had me so excited, looking for 2 bedrooms and what not. And now we probably won't even move. I miss Nick SO SO SO SO SO SO SO bad. I didn't get to talk to him yesterday because they took the phone away at his treatment. He hasn't called yet today. I really hope he does. I want to hear his voice and tell him what's been going on. I feel like I have no friends. I don't know whether I'm more angry than sad or other way around. I hate depression.